Superfast Ferry to Greece...Not so super fast, but full of adventure

When we mentioned the need to take notes for the blog about the ferry, Clare sighed “Oh Jesus.” That is how fantastic the experience on board was!

1) The kids got palatial estates, and the adults got human dioramas. The human dioramas had thin walls, ladders for bunk beds, and toilets that doubled as shower benches.
2) The ferry did have a “pool,” we use the word pool very loosely because it was more like a mop bucket. No one could dive in because you would die(from the head trama or the ebola virus). There were some dirty, skuzzy, trashy people on board and no one got in… that is how bad it was.
3) Dinner consisted of noodles and ragu. When our no cheese friend saw parmesan within two feet of her she screamed “CAN SOMEONE SPEAK GREEK SO THAT THEY CAN TELL THEM NO CHEESE FOR ME?” Harvey really wanted to tell her that the way to ask for no cheese in Greek is to say “IMA FUCKINGRE TARD,” but instead he said they can speak English. Later at dinner she demanded to know where the sun was going to set. Harvey needed a gun, not a compass!
4) Speaking of sunsets…another parent wanted to take a picture of that elusive sunset(a picture from a boat that could be sinking in one hour and is full of cheap, smelly travelers). Brent told here that she could walk around the perimeter of the entire boat and certainly she would find it. She asked “Do you want to see the moon?” She threatened to moon him and show him the “Sea of the tranquility that flows right down the middle” of her own personal moon. WHAT?? Brent went into the fetal position and wanted his mom. That was not an option on board the good ship fuck it up so, Brent lost it and had to drink.
5) JOJO Discotheque! A restaurant transforms itself into a club at night. A club for anyone, but really for the teenagers on board who want to dance, drink, and get observed by nasty men with tight, tight jeans. Our students joined in the fun and this is what ensued.
a. Many need that first drink of their lives. Being the smartest students at our school they jumped head first into debauchery by pre partying with CHEAP VODKA in the room and following that with TEQUILA SUNRISE!
b. We had two children puke, four children cry, two children tattle tale, and two children with NASTY hangovers.
c. We had to close down shop 15 minutes early because two 35 plus sketchy guys got in a bar brawl.
d. When went to do room checks we couldn’t find two children. They were found on deck with some Australian students who decided to pack beer bongs instead of sleeping bags. They were trying to convince our students to bong beers, do drugs, and have sex. Also on deck were children from Canada getting hammered with their teachers and Contiki tours 18-35 crowd. The Contiki folks were taking the drunk tank tour all around Europe.
e. Back in the rooms, the beds were vibrating because of the boat. We are sure that was special for the 85 pound drunk girls trying to sleep and not puke!

Award

Best Meal of the trip—Superfast Ferry Breakfast—a croissant and hard boiled egg, and on the side a roll!
Best Décor—The non-smoking session flanked by two smoking sections.